Monday, March 3, 2008

Do I come out or not

I recently discovered a fellow ward member on NOM.  This was somewhat exhilarating, because even though I knew he was redefining his relationship with the church, I am completely "in the closet" in my ward; yet I could now interact with a local fellow member without blowing my cover.  Mind you, in real life people see me wearing non-white shirts and such, and I certainly make nontraditional comments, but I still go to most meetings.  And have a very "high" calling in the ward.  I've been debating "outing" myself to this guy for some time, but I'm not really sure how that would play out.  Given the negative reaction that often follows overt questioning, I'm interested in carefully controlling how much information I share with people who are basically acquaintances (i.e. fellow ward members).  Ah, life in the liminal lane!


Blogger Shadow Spawn said...

I'd be curious to learn what your calling is...just out of curiosity of course. And it might help to know in order to comment appropriately on posts such as this one. For example, you would like to be able to reach out and find a common ally with this other NOM within your ward, but are worried of the implications and consequences if you are outed in full. Well, the consequences and implications are going to be different if you are the bishop, or Elder's Quorum Pres as opposed to some other calling. Imagine the psychological impact on the ward if it's discovered that a member of the bishopric has been walking the line of apostacey for some time.

To be on the safe side, I'd probably just keep quite until you are really ready to "come out" because that's what you'd be risking anyway. In the end it will be better for you, your friends, and family if you are the one who decides when and how you come out, instead of being "outed" Then it seems like a scandal, making you look like a hypocrite. My 2 cents.

March 16, 2008 at 2:47 PM  
Blogger Ujlapana said...

Yes, well, as an EQP, I consider the implications of any potential exit strategy very carefully! Of course, as long as my wife stays active I suppose that I will too, but it is not my intention to "move up the ladder" from here. I think a nice councilorship is in order....

March 17, 2008 at 4:16 PM  
Blogger Sister Mary Lisa said...

Sounds like you will someday want to approach the other NOM in your ward. How'd you discover who it really was? That's interesting.

May 20, 2008 at 9:10 AM  

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